Today was the worst anxiety that I have experienced in a long time. It started early this morning while reading the news. I don't normally read the news because it tends to make me depressed. Today I wanted to see what happened to the missing 15 month old who shares the same name as my daughter, who is also 15 mo. She was found dead. Raped, strangled to death. A 15 month old child. I really screwed up by reading the details of the case & the crime & what had been done to this child. It literally made me so disgusted, so sick and so damn angry that I could've killed someone. This rage was followed by severe sadness and horrendous anxiety as my mind went in a billion different directions worry about all of the people and situations that I have to keep my child away from. It scares me to think that these people hurt these children, even murdering them to get their rocks off?? This is something that I cannot even wrap my head around. On the other hand, I cannot live my life in 24/7 fear and panic over these things bc it's not healthy either. I'm so messed up today that I just want to go to sleep.

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