Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog
You have still missed my point. I was referring to the threads about the poor male therapist who had a female client who was not the nicest person on earth to deal with. My comparison was not hasty at all - and was not in reference general posts as to whether a referral was going to be useful to the client or not - that is not for me to determine and I really don't think for anyone else but the client. I have said many times that I don't believe either side need keep on with someone they don't like or want to work with - like in any other business relationship.
I stand by my analogy.
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Sorry, but I don't think I've missed your point at all; I simply view this issue very differently than you do. No big surprise, right? Personally, I don't believe that either of us can claim that one of us is right and the other is wrong. We can only state our own perception, our own experience or belief. We can only disagree and go from there. We both have a different and very contrasting view of what goes into therapeutic situations, and those beliefs or views are flavored by our personal experiences and in both our lives, our "work" experiences. Each of our work and personal experiences are varied and individual. Because of my own work and personal experiences of psychotherapy, I do not and can not buy into your analogy and I view it as inaccurate and flawed, but I accept that you stand by it. We can agree to disagree. I can't say that your view is wrong because I can not say I have experienced what you have gone through, and you can't say that my view is wrong because of the same. In fact, all of our arguments/discussions on this issue on this forum falls into the same category. We are all correct based on our own experiences and beliefs, and we are all incorrect based on the experiences and beliefs of others on this forum.
I do, however, agree with you that neither side (client vs. therapist) "need keep on with someone they don't like or want to work with". How we might differ is that I feel that the therapist has a greater responsibility than the client to make the "transition" from working with to referring out a client easier and less traumatic. Can it be totally non-traumatic to most clients probably not? The exception is those clients who are totally dismissive and could care less what the therapist feels or wants. But it is the responsibility of the therapist to be cautious, open to negative feedback without becoming defensive, skilled in handling their own personal emotions and the emotions of the client's, cooperative, gentle and caring toward the client. When the client wants to leave--it's perfectly okay for her to do nothing other than cancel the appointment . .. and in some cases, I personally think it's okay to just NOT SHOW UP!