I am so ashamed of my depression and suicidal ideation. I have a hard time talking about it to people. I do a "good enough" job of hiding it. I recently applied for a job and they asked if I had any disabilities. At first I was like No then I saw major depression was listed as a disability. So I marked yes. I'm worried if I get an interview they will ask me about what my disability is since it isn't "obvious".
I know I should probably goto to therapy but I don't know what I want to accomplish. So what's the point in going? I'm ashamed that I'm so depressed and I have nothing to be depressed about. I just want to die. I have thought about calling the suicide hotline many times, but in the end I didn't. What's the point? There's nothing they can do for me.