How can I live in a house with four other people (wife, two teenagers and one teenager's friend), two dogs and two cats and still feel so desperately alone? I feel like I am coming unglued inside but I can't say anything. My wife knows about my situation and depression, but has limited patience and interest. What am I going to say to her anyway? She's heard it all already and I don't want to be a constant drag on her.

I'm 64 years old, stuck in a dead-end but well-paying job that has me stuck at home most of the time. A lot of time there is little to nothing to do and when there is something to do, I find it almost intolerably boring. I'm not asking for solutions or advice; I just want to vent. I see a pdoc and a therapist and have recently joined a men's therapy group. I am on meds. I exercise and meditate. I have all those bases covered.

I feel like there is nothing to look forward to in life. Retirement is not a possibility right now, but even if it were, it is not the answer. More idleness and feelings of uselessness? Please. I desperately need a feeling of purpose and meaning.

Sorry for the rant. Thanks for reading.