Hi d.o.a.

You know it wasn't you that wasn't good enough for him, no child at all........just through virtue of what they are..........children..........would be good enough for him
And from the things you've said...........I find it pretty impossible to believe that he ever knew, or made any effort to know you, the person you actually were/are.
So how can his judgement/opinion of your value count in the slightest when he didn't even actually know you???
But maybe look at it this way...........if he made blanket negative judgements on people based on their gender or race or religion...........and never saw the people inside........just like all he has seen are "children"........you wouldn't tolerate those judgements at all, right??!! You certainly wouldn't be thinking.........he could actually be right, would you??!!
Every single child is going to have something special about them, every single person is going to have something special about them, regardless of what he thinks
So yes, d.o.a. you would have had true value as a child (whether he saw it or not!!), and I know for a fact that you have true value now
The shame should be all his, you have true value and you always have had

Alison