Right now I'm in IOP so I'm not seeing my regular therapist. However I LOVE my therapist in the program. I wish she accepted insurance so I could see her on the outside. But my outside therapist is really good too. She's able to help me reframe my negative thinking.

My pdoc...well she's actually a nurse practitioner. Which isn't so bad. I do like her, she's very nice and does listen, the only thing is she's very "by the book" and doesn't like to experiment. I'm a non traditional patient. I don't respond to traditional methods of treatment. It took forever to convince her to let me try emsam. And now that it's causing insomnia she wants me to quit after just three weeks. She doesn't take my depression serious enough - she kept telling me the Wellbutrin was working even though I was flat and suicidal in her office. She also said the ECT should be enough but I know from experience that it's not. She seems to forget past experiences. But she's nice enough.

I'm not sure she'll be able to continue seeing me on an outpatient basis. If not I need to find a new pdoc. I could go back to my old one but I'd rather not. She's really good but sort of short tempered. Doesn't like to listen to my opinion. And she hospitalized me at the drop of a hat. So even though she's good I'd like to try to find someone else. I just don't know how long it's going to take.