Sometimes I think that people just need a way to find the courage to make their own decisions, to find that sometimes we succeed and sometimes we fail but it's all a learning process.

When my kids would always call me to vent and for advice, many many times it was for the same problem or same kind of problem over and over again. At that time, I was giving advice. Then, I realized I was attacking things the wrong way. Instead of giving the advice, I started asking them how they thought they could handle something. What supports were available in the community that might be helpful to them. We would research things and talk about them and ultimately, they started to find the strength and have the know-how to find their own way through their issues.

Helping them to become more self sufficient was a better answer than giving advice. They got their needed courage and some self esteem back and now I have kids that look first and ask for advice second (for the most part).

Maybe that may help your situation too. Just know that it takes time for someone to learn how to do this for themselves. We need a level of patience and support to give to them for this to work.

I wish you well!