Seeing my MD Thursday, he never pushes meds on me but is probably going to tell me again he wants to increase lamictal and add abilify. Which I've been resisting but maybe I should. I've been on hypomanic end for a few weeks, some too intense, some mild and totally ok. No depression, at all, minus one day intense and a couple mild, in the last 8 weeks. Whenever I see doctor it's kind of both a hopeful and discouraging thing. It acknowledges that I have a medical condition, which is a problem to some degree because I mostly fight that and keep thinking it's something I am not doing right and not a medical problem. Though it persists. I have not been the same since my 'break' in Nov 2014. I've lost touch reality probably 5 times since. Sometimes I think each break causes some amount of brain damage, or really alteration is what I mean, that does a certain amount of neuro-re-wiring. And then you have to learn to compensate for that.
Well, now I'm officially rambling which I've done a lot of lately. I'm doing ok functional -wise but my thoughts race a good part of the day, thus the ramble. Thanks for listening I'll stop now