Next new T,

I don't want you, or pdoc or meds or bp. I want to stick my head in the sand and pretend if I have a nice predictable life I'll be fine. I want "Ana" back! I want my spotless house back. The meds made me apathetic and fat. I don't appreciate it. I want to work. I want the buzz of a fast paced life. I want all the things that "you" (MH team) take away. I don't want to be a wife or mother. I don't care if those things get taken from me. I'll live in the darkness of depression. I don't care. I want me back, delusions and all. But instead I'll take the stupid meds as my husband hands them to me like a good little wife because no one wants me to be me and I'll see you in a couple of weeks secretly hating you and everyone else in my life for forcing "what's best" on to me.