1. You can continue to have the willingness to ask these types of questions. You're never going to get it all right, but coming here and asking this question is so significant and heartwarming. I want to reach through the computer and give you a hug myself. Keep asking questions - it's not the answers that will serve you best, it's remaining teachable.

2. Take time for self-care. Parenting isn't easy. Parenting a teen isn't easy. Parenting a teen with ASD isn't easy. Parenting a teen with ASD and DID is beyond 'not easy'. If you don't take care of you, your ability to take care of her will suffer.

Beyond that, I'm going to stop with the suggestions because I think that to be the best parent you can be in this case, you're going to have to find your own answers. I know that kind of flies in the face of what I said earlier about continuing to ask questions so let me explain. She is not ASD or DID - in other words, she is not her diagnosis. Each individual has individual needs and as her parent, you're going to know her best of all.

Imagine traveling to China and being asked by everyone you meet, "What do Americans think of x,y, or z?" It is daunting to speak for an entire country or culture. Likewise, grouping us all together to determine things like needs, desires and wants has serious drawbacks and shortcomings. I can only speak for myself - or in my case, I can speak for two of us... but we would have to say that your approach would be well accepted by most if it was powered by love and acceptance. I think you've already mastered those.