Hello,
This is my first time posting or talking about my abuse with unbiased peers.
Long story short: I am a N-Magnet and co-dependent person. I fell head over heels for man who had textbook NPD which started to show after a few months of living together. I was successful, beautiful, and smarter than him which triggered his evil side. I've always been able to put on a happy face and get things done, despite my own bipolar disorder. He used anything and everything against me, emotionally and physically.
One day after I picked him up at work, and I disrupted whatever conversation he was texting away with one of his many "narcissistic supplies" by trying to talk about our issues.
While still under the hypnosis of his narsassistic ways, I let him back in the car and ran every light trying to find a police car. I had to stop and he got out. I went to the police station, but decided to hold off and think about it before pressing charges. Well, 2 days later I went to the police and pressed charges. They held him in county jail for nearly 5 months. After the first 3 months I paid for phone calls and exchanged hundreds of letters, him professing his love and need for me on the "outside"
Magically his bail was dismissed And his case will be heard in municipal court, because when I wrote my statement I begged for mental health treatment. Upon his release, he immediately broke the no contact order and proceeded to verbally abuse me on facebook messenger. I reached out to any of his potential new victims I could find, but most are
He hasn't given me a single call or text, like I never existed, though I did hear he sent out some revenge porn. How did he even get a phone without a penny to his name? I went so far as to even text him a suicide note and told him I was in the hospital on my birthday (ok I lied to test if ANY of his letters were sincere). Radio silence.
I cannot stop wondering if he will even get the notice to show up in court, or if he'll even show up if he doesn't skip town (or hasn't already).
Going on 6 months since I had him taken away - his birthday actually (4/18) will Ben 6 months to the day...
The mental torture has left me feeling emptying inside. I hate myself, I have rage issues, depression (mixed episodes), suicidal idealations, agoraphobia, anti social, no interest in dating or sex. I can't work. I can't function, especially "knowing" he is probably already living off his next victim. I've applied for disability.
THIS video below is exactly what I needed. It outlines 50 symptoms of a new (not yet in DSM) Complex form of PTSD called "Narsassistic Abuse Syndrome."
(Can't post link due to lack of posts but look it up on youtube)
Despite the frequency and severity of physical harm I survived, I have not been able to find stories From anyone else that was lethally attacked or especially anyone who had their psychopathic partner arrested rather than fleeing. I honestly felt that if I didn't get him taken away, he would have killed me in in my sleep within a week, because he couldn't take the pressure of being caught cheating.
I made this video to tell my story and soothe my soul:
(Can't post link due to lack of posts but look up my channel "Curvy And Curious" on youtube)
Thank you for letting me share
-Emmi