Its been a long time since I posted in the forum of any category. I'm always depressed I always have been I guess. I am taking celexa but it doesn't help at all with anything. I think about my life and whether I have ever been happy at any point. The conclusion I often come to is that at no point ever have I been happy I've had some happy moments sure spending time with my grandfather watching cartoons on Saturday morning eating cereal but they were just little intervals where I wasn't deeply depressed. I don't know when my depression started but I know I had it when I was 5 some of my earliest memories are remembering hating myself and being depressed in kindergarten. I meet someone online talk to them get to know them become close with them and then they leave for no reason at all. I don't do anything to upset them or anything they just stop talking to me. I seem to be pretty unimportant and very easily cast aside. Whereas I am loyal and have never left anyone I'm always there when someone needs me or needs someoneone to talk to but people seem to forget about me. I wonder if I'm just not meant for the world maybe I'm way too sensitive to be here.