Quote:
Originally Posted by clairerobin
People will judge you, people judged me. I don't care though, because they have not the tiniest clue what it's like having a toxic person in their life. You need to be true to what you want, what you need and what you deserve. I believe you are a nice person, otherwise you wouldn't be torturing yourself over this.
You don't need anyone's permission to make your decision. It's your decision. It's your life, not theirs. I wish I had known when I was ten years old that I had a mother who was incapable of love and a mother who was mentally ill. That would have at least made me realise I didn't cause all the turmoil.
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Unfortunately you're right about that. I'd like to think that my friends aren't judgemental, but there is always that chance that they may think that I'm overreacting or whatever. Most of them have been supportive of me so far when it came to other issues that I had with her and a few other people like my husband. Hopefully they didn't get sick of me talking about stuff that's stressful and unpleasant. I've always been there for them, so that wouldn't be fair if they abandoned me now. They probably won't. I just worry a lot.
One of my friends gets along fine with her siblings, so it might be harder for her to understand what I'm going through. One friend who knows me well is an only child. I hope that I don't end up losing any of them now as I'm already in enough pain as it is. I can't deal with anymore at the moment.
Thanks for your kind words-
I'm glad that you were able to finally get some closure about your mother. You sound like a nice person do who didn't deserve to be treated so badly. I hope that more people will respond to me, but since my post was so long, I'm afraid that some people won't read it. Hopefully a few other people will respond to me and offer me some advice or share their own stories too.