I really tried to address the problem with my therapist but it is very hard. she is already the best therapist of my city, and the others i've seen were awful.

I really try hard to remain calm, but it is not so easy. I am constantly scared, paranoid and I think every bad thing. I feel like I'm losing the last bits of sanity that I have left. And on top of it all, I'm suffering from a crushing loneliness which gives me only more room to do my OCD rituals.

I thank all of your for your answers.