Oh no. No, indeed you are not a jerk. And omg, if you ever figure out how we stop making excusing-statements for ppl who ARE being jerks, please bottle and sell it -- you will make millions & I'll be your first customer!

Lemme ask something: Did your parents do this whilst you were growing up? Bc I srsly think I caught it from mine. There was aklways (or nearly always) some mitigating factor pulled in outta left field, ranging from "Well perhaps he was just having a bad day" to "Well, now, you know Aunt Ella's family had a very hard go of it..." etc etc ad infinitum.

So did I imprint that? Oh hale yes.
Now I'm working on telling myself that it's OK to not like the things and behaviours I dislike.
There are some things that we really shoud NOT make allowances for imo -- and that's OK!

Best,
Chyia, BTDT Club