I deal with anxiety my whole life, i'm kinda okay with panic attacks due to some particular situations, but when it comes to intrusive thoughts and anxious feelings at home, when I'm not currently working, all of those feelings that happen all of a sudden on a daily basis...I can't. Because I don't understand it really and it just makes me wanna crawl in bed.
I'm unemployed now, stopped leaving the house, and my day looks...awful.
I do daytime sleeping, I wake up around two o clock when my mother comes from work, sometimes I can barely speak to her...and there I just sit and all these thoughts come to my head..
Each day I have these thoughts about how really sick I am, who I am, what's my diagnosis, am I not becoming psychotic? Or maybe I'm schizophrenic? I'm afraid of myself, because my OCD does not accept any uncertain things. I can't live NOT knowing things. I usually get some flashbacks and I start to dwell on them and get panicked because maybe that dwelling will make me lose control... And then it goes about my physical health. And how unable I am to function in society, though it;s not that true. And there are lots and lots of thoughts...even when I see a car on tv I start to think about my inability to drive due to anxiety... And that's how my day looks like, 24/7.
I literally forgot that there's a world outside of this house.

Oh, and there was this guy from pizza delivery, i opened the door for him and turned back to look for my wallet...and these thoughts came "is he looking at me? is he? in what way?" and this was so awful.