Hello mrsjoggers: Unfortunately, the Skeezyks is probably one of the worst people to reply to your post! I've tried to make changes in my life SO many times & I always seem to just end up slumped back into the same old patterns. However, to the extent that change is possible, I would have to say that, from my perspective, it occurs in small steps. It's good to have a vision of what you want to achieve in the end. But it seldom can happen all at once. One has to take it a step at a time. Writing out a plan that includes both short term objectives & long term goals may be helpful.

One thing I believe is important is to have people around you who support your efforts to change. This is one thing I never had. It seems like all of the people I have ever had around me in my life just wanted me to remain the same person I had always been & were not interested in helping me to change. They may not have stood in my way. But neither did they make any effort to support what I was trying to do. So I was just on my own & had to drag their lack of interest along in the process. I wasn't strong enough to do it under those circumstances.

The Buddhists put allot of emphasis on the "sangha"... the community of people who are on the path. And I believe this is because they realize that in order to make significant changes in one's life, one must have the support of like-minded people. I believe they are correct.

Good luck implementing your plan!