It took me a long time to recognise how negative I was. When I did realise it, I decided to stop talking negatively all the time, like talking for hours on end with my friend about how much our lives sucked. Instead I decided to try to improve my life. Merely stopping talking so negatively all the time changed things immediately. Nobody wants to be around a whiner who always has problems. And nobody wants to talk about the same problem forever. If one needs to do that, that's what paid therapy is for.

Being a good friend is much more than informing someone you are choosing to end the friendship. And friendships usually just end organically, people drift apart and move on, without an announcement.

Now I really watch how much (often) I burden my friends with my problems. And I don't keep talking about the problem forever. I think my friends today are the first true friends I've had, because it's based on mutual sharing of normal life. It's not based upon mutual commiseration of how much our lives suck.

I have the utmost of respect for people who want to talk about their problems if they are also open to talking about solutions. If problems are merely presented without the possibility of solution, then that person is just wasting my time.