Hello, ScientiaOmnisEst

I understand how you feel completely It all seems hopeless when we're not finding success in our lives, and on top of that we can barely move and get out of bed
It's not your fault at all, it's on the depression, and the depression alone is to blame

I can see that you did explain your situation to us very clearly, and we can understand how you're feeling because you expressed yourself pretty well!!! Granted, it's difficult to do that out in the real world, but being able to do it here means that you got the seeds necessary to grow the required skills that will help you socialize and express yourself face-to-face with people!

Managing expectations is important, because this whole process relies heavily on trial and error, which means there will be mistakes, but as time goes by, you'll recognize those mistakes and be skillful at not committing them again, and then you'll be a true professional!!!

And there's absolutely no shame in getting help! In fact, this means you're willing to change your life for the better, and that you're more into success than failure!

I hope everything goes well for you!

Sending many many hugs