My T suspects that I may have had some preverbal trauma. Some of my reactions to T have been weird, like when she suggested, for valid reasons at the time, terminating therapy and not emailing. It made no sense to me that I screamed all the way home in my car after that session. I never scream like that. It scared me!! My feelings about abandonment don't fit with the reality and I don't have words for them. Preverbal experiences are a possible answer.

Echos, I hope you and your T can figure it out together!