I feel like no one will care here...because heck..no one knows me and what life has been like.

Kicked out at 17.
Stayed in a bad relationship...because it was better than no relationship.
Kids 30 and 27 not talking to me because I drank after not drinking for 8 years
Never see my grandchildren because I drank after not drinking for 8 years
Left my job of 19 years..making really good money and only hear from 2 people
Boyfriend moved in with me 2 years ago
Boyfriend doesn't work and doesn't pay any bills
Boyfriend is addicted to drugs
Fighting with my mother because we have communication issues

THEN..yesterday I go do my taxes and find out I owe 3000 dollars plus the 500 fee for them to prepare the tax forms.

Boyfriend...I tell this too....closes himself in room all day. I try to give the benefit of the doubt that he is a man...and they sometimes can be lost for words until they think about something for a while.

however, it would have been nice if when I told him...he hugged me or something and said...don't worry...you or (WE) will get thru this...I feel super alone with all these problems...I'm sitting on the couch....talking to myself on this thread.

I feel I deserve so much better from everyone around me...I haven't drank in almost 3 months. I am 52 years old...I have been there for everyone ALWAYS. I am in treatment for Major Depression. Nothing is working..it seems my world gets smaller and smaller.

But, I will keep putting one foot in front of the other today...to see what life brings me.....others have it worse I know that...but this feels pretty awful to me.