Quote:
Originally Posted by elevatedsoul
i was wondering;
if you have co-host and 2 are working the body... what would that feel like?
would one be more dominant in the mind while one is more dominant in the body?
would you feel 2 ways at the same time? even opposing emotions?
are these really the symptoms of dissociative disorder?
The Spectrum of Dissociative Disorders: An Overview of Diagnosis and Treatment - HealthyPlace
i have all of that  
how come a doctor has never tried to talk to me about this?
is it just that i never presented any symptoms of dissociation?
it seems everyone i talked to doesnt really grasp the gravity of what im trying to explain.. the last psychologist sort of did though i think.. he said that these issues are severe - and that i am very interesting person, but he didnt recognize dissociation? is it possible that why he diagnosed me with somatization and ptsd?
i was in the mental health clinic for like 4 years... dunno why they never noticed the dissociation... i know i was out of it atleast a few times, if not 100% of the time when going there.. but i guess i was still self medicating back then too.. 
i need a break 
i dunno, i wish someone could just see all my symptoms so i can stop the madness - but seems like i hide alot of the symptoms for some reason... when i get in the doctors office you know? its just hard... i guess thats why i tried to write everything down, but they wouldn't read my notes or take them seriously.. no wonder i quit seeing them as well as they diagnosed me with bipolar  i have no mania... although sometimes my mood is different... the doctors probably dont know what to think about me i hope they dont think im just making a bunch of stuff up due to some inconsistencies or something... the last pdoc already put on my file that i was non-compliant... but if you ask me he was non-negotiable... wouldnt listen to me at all..
reading alot of interesting stuff... i cant wait to talk to a doctor about it..
im gonna spill the beans this time; hopefully its sometime this year...
so i can get an answer to whatever is happening inside my mind... and hopefully it doesnt make me go completely insane... like self destruct
i really would just like to know what is going on, that way i wont be so confused and doubting everything... have a name for whats going on so i can stop fearing the unknown and maybe come back to earth and try to work on getting better
:/ geez i write too much, why cant i say what i want to say in fewer words???? |
it really is about you being open with a therapist and telling them your experiences because from the outside, it often isn't evident. it took me 12 or so years to be able to tell my psychiatrist a lot of things related to dissociation because she wanted it to come from me when the time was right though she knew in the very beginning. the time was not right until just recently due to the severity of how things were for me in the first few years and then several years of stability where there was no need to talk about it which then led to wanting to talk about it finally which ended up actually stirring things up by accident.
but since they cannot see from the outside, you have to be the one to tell them your symptoms and experiences. i did a lot of reading over the years so presented things to my psychiatrist using the word dissociation and then described different ways it affects things, how it is, etc. so she knew i wasn't just saying things i read and just thinking it was what it was even though i did have to read a lot in order to put pieces together.