Hi,

I've been a not so good husband in the past. My wife and I struggled with intimacy problems early in our marriage, in large part due to me not knowing how to develop an intimate relationship or how to listen deeply, and in part to her mental and physical health problems. I used porn as an outlet for years, and lied and hid it from my wife. She found out about it, about 4 years ago.

After that it came out that she was emotionally and mentally abused as a child for years. She always felt like she wasn't good enough, and my actions confirmed it to her.

I hate what I did, and how I hurt her. I had no idea it would ever hurt her as it did. If I had one wish, it would be a time machine. I have so many regrets.

She has a lot of health problems these days that keep us at home often, and unable to go out. Her health can turn very suddenly and its hard to make plans.

She needs to feel like I want to date her and pursue her. I'm trying to figure out things I can do at home on very short notice.

Basically, when the opportunity presents itself, when her health is good, and we have an hour or more of quiet time, I want to surprise her with a date night.

Ideas??

To any wives out there... What makes a woman feel special, heard, pursued, appreciated? I handle most of the household chores and kid stuff already, so division of work ain't it! I need date ideas.

Thanks,