sorry about being so ignorant... i dont like asking many questions because i really don't like to make myself look stupid but this stuff is really bothering me...
im constantly forgetting what is going on, what im thinking about, or what i was trying to do ect... past memory is null and cant seem to create and new memory...
as usual im just being obsessive and trying to figure things out...
i mean its hard not to be obsessive when you feel like this, like there is a sense of urgency because you never know when you are going to slip out of reality completely and not remember anything at all, like how to walk or talk or whatever...
its scary and im so confused... it feels like there is a huge wall in my head that is blocking everything, memories, thoughts, actions.. i try to contemplate something and everything will go blank, unable to think or unable to really remember what i was trying to think about in the first place... sometimes a minute or 2 will pass while im trying to remember and an image will pop in my head that reminds me what i was doing...
other times i just say ^#@^# and try to do something else and forget about it...
i try to be as calm as possible because i feel like if i panic it will get alot worse...
but the truth is i dont understand any of what im feeling, i've never heard anyone describe this before you know? it just doesnt make sense to me... my brain is only 26 years old it shouldn't be doing these things...
i feel like my worse enemy... but i just want to help myself get better so bad but the more i try to figure things out and make things better the worse things get...
sometimes i just feel like giving up...
but i dont want to burden my family...
i dunno why i even try to research anything when i just forget it anyway... grrr
and the doctors cant seem to figure me out either... i hate this...
sorry....