I don't know why. I just keep getting these waves of depression like something rushing through my blood. i just fill up. I feel used, I feel like I did when I was 15 and had just put a stop to the abuse. I feel paranoid like everyone takes advantage. I feel so gullible and insecure, there is a huge knot in my stomach, diazappam doesnt help anymore. I feel people laugh at me. what have I ever done.