thanks, i know its a sensitive thing and needs to be handled with care..
i dunno why i get obsessive sometimes, i just have something inside of me that drives me to know, demands me to know i guess.. im ok now, gonna take it easy for a bit and just try to pay attention to myself.. cause i know its not the same for everyone, its just that this memory stuff has been bothering me for so long
and just because i have some signs, doesnt necessarily mean that i have DID.. or even a discociative disorder, but i really would like to know why i have this thing that seems like amnesia...
i hate not being able to remember my past and not being able to really form new memories, knowing what i did today or yesterday or whatever sucks

i understand that something like DID is a secret thing that will hide itself from everyone including the one that has it, so me prying and trying to understand and obsessively searching for answers will probably only compound the issue..
but i have to admit that i am completely fascinated with it... because it would explain so much, but im not gonna get into it until i get back into therapy for sure, but its just kind of like one of them things that you do for ever and never realize it till someone points it out to you ya know? i feel like im just realizing some of these things about myself that i have never thought of or even considered... since the beginning of this year and start of a new major depressive episode late last year... which im doing better depresion wise right now, so im just gonna be grateful for that

i had a lot of weird dreams last night so.. i need to take it easy for a while, appreciate all the input