I've found an hour long online interview with you. It's the one thing I'm not sure I can tell you (even though I keep watching bits when I need comfort). I already told you I randomly came across a short video of you on YouTube (finding that wasn't quite as random as I made out) so if I tell you about this one it's going to sound like more than a coincidence. I don't want you to be uncomfortable with me watching it. It's the only thing I feel like I can't tell you and I'm not sure I like it.