Sherri:

It's happening all over again....the confusion of dealing with society. Too many Others show up at work, too many attitudes and fears, too many spoken words....awkwardness....embarrassment....horror...

I just want to curl up in a ball forever in seclusion and hiddenness. This only took months to get like this where the last time we endured for a whole year.

The difficulties of dealing with other humans that would rather roast you then help makes it unbearable, what with the crazy neighbor that rages constant insults for hours followed by the put downs of our partner... it's like 24/7 abuse from outside, inside, work,.... even in our own head! The name calling, slams, hateful remarks, in and out!

I deserve better from life than this I thought. It's just about enough to quit it all, but there are Others that won't allow that to happen, but to prolong the agony of living as a means of self-torture like some cruel joke directed inwards.

Sorry to rave, but I'm running out of places to vent, what with all the crazy negativity that engulfs our presence.

Laughed, shunned, disrespected, finger pointed, snide remarks, whispers, looks, chided, raised eyebrows, giggles, sneers....sounds a lot like paranoia- but its flagrantly real...the story of our life.

I guess that if Creation needed a weirdo, I'm the chosen one to make others laugh and feel good about themselves. So not happy but yet stuck.