lying in the centre of a road

all the traffic had been stopped, and someone was leaning over me saying that i shouldn't do this, and all i kept saying was- i want to die, i want my life to be over, this life is a mistake.

eventually i was told that if i wanted to go to heaven this instant (which i did), i had to get on this person's bus- and sit down in my seat, and my life would be over

and of course, at the time i was only a child so was really gullible and honestly believed the bus led to heaven

i will never, ever forget that, such a vivid experience of wanting to die.. had everything planned out

people still comment about that today. they say you must have been pretty messed up if you were so sure