T ams I discussed a few weeks ago why I won't let therapy help me in one area of my life.
This weekend I say on the edge of my bed - forced my medical complication due to this area in my life - and asked myself why????

The only answer I came up with is that T isn't for ever. Why would I put all my eggs in one basket so to speak.

I blurted this out to T today. Asked her why therapy/her doesn't feel enough as it is. I feel I need more.

T said, "I think it's because you experienced such extern deprivation that they feeling of not being enough comes from a very young place. Add to that, you were made to believe you were getting enough, you were lied to ams I think you lost the abilty to trust/believe or even know what is enough.

This was one of those door knobs moments. I left it to near the end. I hope to continue Thursday.