Thanks for your replies. I simply cannot find anything that I enjoy enough to take place of the drugs & that lifestyle, when I go in search of any kind of fulfilment I only ever find it when I feel the same kindof freedom & reckless joy I had when I was younger.. It normally leads to me using. This is 3 YEARS sober from meth, not 3 months. I don't think it's ever going to end. I think about ending it myself instead. I've read that article, I don't know what to take from it. I had more "connection" when I was using.