so this is pretty devistating.

recently i found out that my family had planned my nan's funeral- the songs, the bible readings, what everyone was going to say, where it was going to
be held, etc etc.

she's not dead yet, but this is horrible.

i have also been informed by them that i can't write any words to be read at the funeral, i can't attend, i can't say my final goodbyes, i can't go near
her... apparently, i'm not "family enough". (family enough, is that a word?). anyway, it is now.

i feel like i'm grieving her all ready- she's 93 years old with dimentia, and i'm not even allowed to phone and see how she's doing in what could be her
last few months, and not allowed to attend the funeral?

feel really upset about this- even more so that i didn't get any say in any of the planning