You sound a lot like me. I don't know that I have any answers, but we can be friends - how's that? I found it a lot easier to make friends through the internet than in person, for several reasons. I'm quiet and easy to overlook. I stutter sometimes too, but not particularly often. I can't usually get a word in when people are having a conversation. I'm short, and I think that a lot of the time people don't even see me or know that I'm there. Also, I was an Air Force Brat, and moved around so much, so no matter where I am I'm the new girl and everybody else has plenty of friends already so they just don't need me. I have social anxiety. One of the things they have always tried to get me to do in therapy (which I resist with everything I've got) is to be more assertive.

Since getting internet connection (almost 7 years ago) and joining some e-mail lists I started to have on-line friends. That has helped me more than anything. I can talk to people this way and they even hear me. I'm not afraid of moving away or them moving away because we can still talk on-line. I have some true friends in my internet pen-pals. I've even met a few of them in person, which is scary and doesn't always go quite as well as through the computer, but we're still friends and always will be. Learning how to have friends this way has also helped me a little bit with learning how to make friends off the computer too. It's a lot less comfortable, but it is possible now.

You could also try therapy - particularly group therapy (a social skills group). It's uncomfortable at first, but it can help. Or, what hobbies do you have? You mentioned tennis. Finding people who share the same hobbies as I do is one of my strategies too. Starting a new hobby is also good.

I'm married too and I have three kids. If you want to write to me, click on my user name and you can PM me or find my website and my e-mail and write to me that way.

<font color=green>Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that, you, too, can become great. -Mark Twain</font color=green>