Yes, I understand. Sometimes when I leave my T, I feel like she just disappears into thin air - or worse, I disappear for her...that as soon as I walk out the door I cease to exist for her. Sometimes it's unbearable. After about a year I was able to talk to her about it and we agreed on check-in emails between sessions. No therapy, just simple 'Are you there?' from me followed by a 'Yes, I am here' from her. It's not always those exact words, but something similar. It really has helped me. It has also made my anxiety lower going into sessions and it has been easier to open up and talk. Perhaps you could bring something like this up with your T? Good luck. It's difficult.