hey. i'm sorry i haven't replied to your PM. i've been in a bit of a funny place... trying to get into work... posting a little... but trying to get into work mostly... and sometimes it is hard figuring out what to say. but i really did appreciate your message and your self-disclosure. i really hope... that you didn't feel like i rejected you by not responding. i really didn't mean for you to feel that way.

(((((freewill)))))) <- if safe

i know that some things can be hard to explain so that people can understand. part of it can be about them not making much sense to us. if we could explain them in a way that other people could understand then maybe we wouldn't need to explain it to them!

i really don't think... that other people with the same condition as us have any special privaledge with respect to understanding where one is coming from or with respect to understanding what is going on and the like. i mean... if we were able to organise our experience well enough to really explain or understand it then i really think that understanding would alter our experience such that we wouldn't need to explain or understand it. but i guess many people disagree with me, so it is perfectly fine if you do too.

i really do think... that nobody understands another person completely. nobody has exactly the same experiences. but other people have some elements of our experiences and there is a way of being able to intimately relate to everybody. other people understand what it is like to feel confused or afraid or in pain. other people understand what it is like to dissociate sometimes or to have experiences that seem 'other'. while they might not experience distress in response to those experiences i'm sure they understand what it is like to feel distressed. i guess i'm just not sure that people with the same dx have any privaledged understanding of the experiences of people with the same dx.

but all that being said... i really do hear that you are feeling disconnected right now. and that you are feeling like people aren't understanding. can you write poems or something to try and express how you feel?