Dear uni therapist,

I really need to see you tomorrow. I had an appointment with a GP today, who called the mental health team for me, and asked them to call me later in the day. They did, but only to tell me that the assessment team has not forwarded my referral to THEM, but to the primary care team instead. Apparently the assessment team has decided that I don't need to be seen by a psychiatrist, and the primary care team has ignored two referrals so far. So I have waited three months just to be told that nothing is being done. Nothing. I don't need to see a psychiatrist? I don't even understand that. I am a patient with bipolar disorder who has been having mood swings since last summer and I clearly need to have my medication reviewed by a specialist, not the primary care team.

When the phone call ended I felt so defeated and so unimportant that I just burst into tears and sobbed for twenty minutes. I haven't slept properly for two days, either. I look physically ill. My eyes hurt. I feel like just giving up, because no one seems to care anyway. I really wanted to call you earlier, I was so upset, but I managed to go to sleep instead. Slept for about an hour. Still have a vile headache.

So I really need you to be there tomorrow. If for some reason you have to cancel, I just don't know what to do with myself. It's not like you cancel sessions very often or anything, so I'm not sure why I'm worried that you will, but I know that I will not stop worrying until I see you sitting in that room. I need you too much, don't I? I shouldn't need you this much. I hate that I do.