Haven't made an actual thread on these forums since I joined so figured I'd discuss a recent event in my life.

I'm not a very social person naturally. What I mean by that is I don't go out much and when I do it's not typically the social scene I'd like to be involved with. I started online dating in late 2014 and met some girls but I only ever met up with one that I considered having an actual relationship with. She was local so we eventually hung out. We went to a few movies, did the hand holding stuff and then I made the stupid decision of moving in with her. I was struggling internally a lot at that point and made a lot of stupid impulsive decisions.

I didn't know it at the time but looking back she was never the type of girl I would date. She was very wild, loose, very loud and social. I have my wild sides but I'm naturally very quiet, not really interested in the party scene too much, hate big crowds of people and pretty much a shut-in. So right off the bat we were mostly incompatible long term (at least in my eyes).

Back to the point of me doing stupid impulsive things. I was convinced at the time that I was in love with this girl as most young people do when they get involved with someone that is in reality no good for them at all. I even let her tattoo me (don't worry, it wasn't her name) that I'm gonna have to try and cover up eventually.

I'm trying to speed this up. She was one of those people that just had to point out each and every one of your flaws. She'd never pass up an opportunity to point out other attractive guys in the room which she knew would make me jealous and insecure. I won't go into everything she did but she was very mentally abusive to me during our relationship. We weren't together very long as I decided to move back to where I was staying before that which was barely an hour away from her. We were still technically together but while I was away from her two of her friends who became my friends during my stay with her told me she was cheating on me with a guy I had already had my concerns about. I was devastated of course. Never before that had I experienced that kind of pain. I confronted her about it and she always maintained she wasn't cheating and that I was the one to blame for us fighting because I chose to entertain the idea of it being true rather than blindly make the mistake of trusting her every word. Unfortunately I chose to believe her for a bit before the truth became too obvious to me to ignore. We broke up and I spent a long time still blaming myself for it. Lust is a powerful thing sometimes.

Fast forward to about a year later and she attempts to contact me on Facebook wanting to try and be friends. This took place around February or March I believe. At this point time had healed those wounds and I saw no reason to hold a grudge. We mostly texted back and forth but we hung out together one time before she asked if we could be friends with benefits. This was recent keep in mind and I had been keeping to myself a lot so the idea of sex without having to work for it didn't seem so bad. After all it's not like I still had feelings for her. So I said yes. The sex was great and for once I felt good about being in control of my emotions around her. Then she starts wanting more. She was surprised that I wasn't begging for another chance to be with her. I had control of myself and she didn't like that. One night she tells me she was hanging out with a guy and he kissed her and they slept together. The kicker was that this was the same guy she cheated on me with. All of a sudden I lost all that control and felt like the same guy she was manipulating before. I try and keep in mind that we're not together so technically she's not doing anything wrong but I realize that she enjoys the mind games. She enjoys the pent up anger inside of me when I get angry with her about it. So I made a choice. I can keep letting this girl get inside my head and undo all the progress I had made, or I can remove the virus from my life. I chose the latter. I deleted her from my social media a few days ago and feel like I'm on track again.

The point of this post is to explain my experience with someone that claims to want to be in my life, yet stabs me in the back every chance she gets. I'm sure if you're reading this you've known someone like this at one point or another. Maybe you've seen it happen to other people. If you are like me and are dealing with something like this follow my lead and cut the virus from your life before it can intrude on your happiness and personal growth.

If you would like to share your stories on this subject please feel free.