This will be kind of jumbled, may not make too much sense either but here I go. Maybe I just need to vent where I feel safe. I don't trust people around me to give an honestly helpful answer.
I'm in a committed relationship of 7 years, not married but I don't ever want to get married. But, we are as good as married. We have 1 child together and one I have from a previous relationship. So me just kicking him out is not easy.
I work 2 jobs to provide for us. I. This economy it is not enough to afford a place of our own so we are living with my mother. She is soon to get remarried and is turning into a person I don't recognize. She invades our privacy, demands we schedule our life to suit her whims and has even gone as far as to tell me I should raise my kids differently. I'm not being a brat, trust me. I know I'm in a lucky situation, yet it feels hostile and it's her way or the highway. Needless to say I want my own mouse hole so I can breathe and take control of my life.
Now to the crux of my situation. The partner. He has not had a job in 7 years. I gave him a break for 5 years because I know it's a tough economy. But things are getting better around here. I don't care what his job is. Just any would make it so we can afford a place. But he won't, or can't, not sure really which it is. I have asked him, pleaded with him told him how unhappy I am. All I get is, it's not the right time, we need to be more financially stable, etc. Anytime I bring it up recently he gets angry and says "I'm depressed about it as well l, reminding me that I'm a failure just stresses me out".
So here I am. Halfway between wanting to properly motivate him to work and silently raging inside because I feel I am being used.