I have these episodes, too. I've gone off my meds before and tried life without them but it was very difficult and emotional so this is how I know I need to be on meds. When I'm in my funk, I always feel like it's the worst one and I'll never escape it. I find myself wanting to do hasty, impulsive things like running away and leaving my family. Fortunately, the lack of energy makes me too exhausted to follow through with it. Once I come out of it, I begin to ridicule myself for being so hyperbolic. But I think this is the nature of the disease. It's not a good representation of reality.