Struggling lately as I've been more aware of my condition, ironically. I long for the days when I thought I was bipolar or just moody and had no idea I had DID. The amnesia is the worst. I don't have complete amnesia, like not remembering what I did in another state but I have emotional amnesia still, which seems worse- half remembering. I had such a good day on Thursday, feeling connected and reassured by my Shrink and then had a really great, long conversation with a work friend- haven't done this in years. Then bam, the next day it's gone. I can still remember that I did connect to those people at the time and that I felt good/happy/safe, but I can't remember what that feels like anymore. My Shrink and my work friend, when I think of them now, might as well be strangers or just objects or characters in a book- I have no connection/relationship with them. This is the worst part of DID- the half remembering.