Fragile ego, wounded ego, narcissism -- healthy and otherwise, shame. Words and concepts that I find hard to understand or pin down and yet they point to or touch on some essential difficulties I believe that I have had. Sense of self? How does one develop it if it isn't there or is "false"?

I know there are a lot of therapy ideas about that, but it's been my experience that without an adequate, functioning sense of self or realistic ego it's hard for some clients (e.g., me) to relate, so that hurtful, shaming experiences with therapists increase the sense of woundedness and shame. Then, round and round the cycle goes.