I know of successful marriages/partnerships where the couple chooses not to live together whether in the same city or not. I don't live with mine all the time, the second therapist I see has a separate abode from her spouse, several colleagues at the university choose it (even when they have jobs at the same univ.) Some have found, after having lived apart for jobs, that space is important.
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Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
Oscar Wilde
Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
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