Hi Fuzzy,

Sometimes, when things are tough, it can help not seeing/looking at "the bigger picture"..........
I know things are so hard for you right now ...........but if there's anything/s you can "fine tune your vision into"/really focus on right now...........I don't know..........your relationship with your husband/making some close time with him............any little thing in your life that means something to you..............the way some music does make you feel/has made you felt...........the warmth radiating to you from here.........how lots of us on here really care about you ...........something/s, anything to help you just a little with the way you're feeling right now

And it is just the first day, right? So that doesn't need to be a bad thing.........that it's just the first day.............
From here............well medication takes time to take effect doesn't it, so perhaps with time to kick in then you could be feeling a whole lot better than right now, and that would be something great............and IF the side effects return then maybe it will help enough to compensate slightly for the effects.........
Or.........the "worst" possibility you might need to stop because of the side effects............let's try to hope that having to stop will gradually lead you to a medication that will truly help without all of that, hey??
I know a lot of "if's", I'm really sorry , but it remains that it's still a maybe that this first day could lead to something much better............and that has to be something worth holding onto........

And you know through all this, whatever happens.........we're still right here for you Fuzzy

Alison