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pinksoil: What the hell was going on?

For a Jungian spin... I suspect you are projecting your animus upon your therapist. The animus is your "inner male" and is comprised of the entirety of your experiences of the opposite sex. No doubt, you are projecting your positive animus upon your therapist because there are some similarities between him and your animus -- these similarities are what "hook" the projection and hold it in place. When you first fell in love with your husband, you probably projected positive aspects of your animus upon him too -- this is what made him appear to you to be the ideal life partner.

What's important to understand about that anima or animus is that it is an image that actually obscures the reality of the other person, who cannot actually live up to the projected image. Nonetheless, it's yours. You may find it helpful to continue your "fantasy" with the awareness that you are projecting. As a result, your therapist may be involved in your fantasies but you would now understand he is only the screen you are projecting your animus upon. As you continue exploring the fantasy material you may find that your animus takes on some characteristics of his own, separate from your therapist. A practice such as active imagination may allow you to enter into a direct dialogue with your animus, independant of your relationship with your therapist or husband.

See also:[*] Active Imagination[*] The Invisible Partners: How the Male and Female in Each of Us Affects Our Relationships