*trigger*


I want to talk to.my ex so bad but he has no phone and doesn't want to talk to me anyway. I want to just talk. He understands me and how I'm like..he's knowledgeable about H. and he's been sober. I got really into it since I have experience starting IVs at my job I just went for it cus I've been depressed lately. I have fibroids -I think because it hurts so bad when I cramp so I used .1 each day for 2-3 days. I feel the withdrawal -I think, I'm too tired to get up in the morning. I have a pdoc but he's so been proud of me we started a riendly relationship outside of work and I don't want to take anything anymore. I haven't slept well lately and my mind is clouded. I'm so scared of what my life will become because I've watched my ex-husband lose everything. I was there the whole time paying his bills, visiting him in rehab, bail, him getting fired, hospitalizations, and I'm afraid that'll be me

Part of me says I can easily stop wheneber. But then why am I fearful