I think that it does go both ways with the sexes. I have had male friends that have been married to women.. who were well not "nice" to them..

Once burned.. twice shy.. I never looked after my marriage - just a choice..

Watching my ex -husband.. thru the years was interesting - he actively went after women that were gentle natured and he could control.. and he was charming.. and these gentle natured women.. wanted that in their life.. so they were attracted...I think they could not "conceive" of a man that evil.. and by the time they figured it out too late...

So I guess I answer the question in a very round about way..

But then there was the case of my neighbor.. who had a thoughtful husband.. a very good guy... so after 14 years of marriage.. she craved excitment.. so she divorced him.. and gave up her kids for an apartment.. and man after man.. so for her.. it was the excitment factor...she and I were friends.. and really that was it.. nothing wrong with the guy.. she craved to excitment the bad boys brought to her..