Quote:
Originally Posted by fijiisland
I am so far off from reality. I can't REALLY date anyone. So since my divorce I have slept with 5 married men. I am currently seeing 2 of them.
I am so lonely, have rock bottom self esteem, no confidence, social anxiety disorder, depression.
I want to change but I just revert back to my old ways. I think I do it for excitement because my life sucks.
I have no one to talk to or count on. I am surrounded by extreme negativity and criticism all the time. I wish I was never born.
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I wonder if there is also the aspect that you are afraid to be with men who are single because that means being vulnerable and trusting, and all the mess that goes along with being with someone who is free to be with you on every level.
Also,.to those judging your moral character must live in glass houses. Seriously, if I had never been with a married man when I was single (I had) I still was doing other things that I felt were wrong. I didn't judge myself more harshly for the married men then I did for some of the other acts I committed that were considered immoral or whatever. When we are lonely we do what we need to do to fill something inside us, and far be it for anyone especially in this forum to judge another person for being lonely.
*life is a beautiful lie*