You are doing a good job self reflecting.

I agree about managing expectations rather than lowering them. For example it's ok to bring concerns up in a polite manner no matter how stupid that concern sounds but it's not ok to voice that concern in angry or demanding manner etc ( that's something I personally have been working on for example instead of my rude and explosive which I tend to do at times like "how many times I have to tell you to wipe this counter after you make coffee " or something similar address minor concerns nicely and lovingly and then life is nice etc it doesn't mean I need to be ok with dirty counter, I just don't need to be a biatch about it.

So I personally think that after few days or weeks of wondering where it's going it will be ok to politely ask where he thinks it is going and then proceed depending on his responses

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