Hello S.Courage: I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. I grew up (many years ago now) in a small town (well... out in the country near a small town actually.) So I have some sense of the predicament you are in. Small towns have their advantages. But they can also be stifling... especially for a young person. And, also, the types of services one might find in a metropolitan area, such as mental health providers, can be extremely limited or non-existent.

I don't know that I have any particularly useful suggestions for you. I simply wanted to let you know that I read your post & wish you all the best as you struggle to find a pathway toward a happier future.