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Old Aug 19, 2003, 01:53 PM
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You don't sound harsh, simply direct and to the point - something which means a great deal to me. Your first few sentences made me laugh - ty. It has been awhile since I've done that. Yes, he is an idiot, to use nice terms.

I have about 6 weeks.......I am trying to get things done and in place. I don't expect you to tiptoe around and wait for me to die - directness always is better and more appreciated.

Two of my doctors agree with you - that he is a major problem and want to help me leave with whatever documentation I may need. I haven't exactly spelled it out, but yes it is an abusive relationship, physical as well as mental. I did at one point get ready to leave and go to a shelter - had everything set up. Then I learned about my back and realized that I needed to be where I am for now.

He is for the most part, a good father. A little low on patience and yells at my son alot - which makes my claws come out and then we have problems. My son is a terrific child - very intelligent for his age. He amazes me sometimes with what he sees.

My T believes that a part of me does not want to leave, because I keep coming back to see him. I know that the moment he senses anything life-threatening, he will break confidentiality and stop me. I have also told him if I sense this I will run............we are leery of one another at times, but I trust him.

At first I wasn't going to answer your question........but I won't lie when directly asked something from someone that I like. I have no wish to upset anyone here, or to cause problems - the reason why I have so far been quiet on the subject.

All I can say is that I am still here, so part of me must be winning. I have no guarantees, but I am still checking into things and waiting on how I heal and what I am able to do.

Hugs and caring are always appreciated.......you are very nice Heidu. Ty.

Mary Alice